Duby got stung by a bee today....
quite the experience i tell ya ! (well not really in comparison to Chaim's little adventures, but i think its worth telling)
it all started at around 5 pm when i decided i was gonna enjoy the nice 70 degree weather (a big change from 90 degrees hot and humid) and went to daven mincha outside (ok, calm down - its not THAT much of a shocker that i daven mincha???) - so i get outside and see the patio chairs were filled with puddles of water from the never ending thunderstorms... make a very short story even shorter, i went to flip the chairs over to drain when i felt a prick (yes a prick!) on my pinkie finger. I looked down and i saw that the metal screw on the chair was rusty (oh Lord - time for a tetnaus shot!!!) - but feeling around, it wasnt at all sharp and i couldnt figure out where this wonderful little prick came from.....
and then ---
there it was ....
the culprit.... black and yellow... and just casually sitting on the chair - not moving, thinking he owns the world... seeing what had just befallen me - i knew that either one of 2 things were about to happen and i needed to make my move fast. Either, panic, anxiety and "oh no!" was gonna set in and consume my every fiber freaking me out that "EEK I GOT A BEE STING!!!!" or, i can take the high road ... and guess what my friends ? thats exactly what i did !!!! (thrilling, i know) - i jumped up and down and screamed "WOO HOO!!! Duby got a bee sting!!! For the first time in about 20 years!!!!" So i continued jumping around (mind you the stinging sensation now turned into a full throbbing) and i skipped into the kitchen ever so excited about my new discovery that i was NOT abotu to faint or die from a bee sting!!! And then of course is that little reminder that chilbirth is MUCH worse than this, so i might as well get over it....
And so my friends, you may think the story ends here, but it really doesnt. Looking at my finger (poor little thing) - i remembered that in teh bathroom i had a box of the Medicain Swabs that i had stolen from Camp like 3 years ago (i over- ordered them anyway so i didnt think they would mind if i casually stole a box) - seeing as i have never used them yet, i felt now would be a good time to open the box... well guess what -- when youre finger is throbbing in pain, and youre a bit on edge, reading simple directions suddenly becomes a freakishly daunting task!!!! For the next 10 minutes (and by the now the throbbing has turned into full blown pain - - edging through my entire finger... slowly through my hand ... oh joy) - i couldnt figure out for the life of me how to get the green gooey stuff out of this little tube !!!!! You would have to get some sort of medical degree just to treat a darn bee sting ... seeing as my frustration was getting me nowhere, and making up my own way of smashing the tube was just not gonna work - i was forced to calm myself down and to read the directions for the hundreth time... it was a miracle - i tell you... G-d above was watching ... so after i got the green goo all over my finger (and hand of course) and smirking with pride that i figured it out - ALL BY MYSELF - i was ready for the goop to kick in... or not ? I dont know what that stuff was SUPPOSED to do , becasue all i know is that my finger was all now all green, still throbbing and now looked to be about twice the size of my other pinkie finger and was in competition with my thumb.
And that little bee was still sitting on the chair - with the most smug look on his face ever (yeah yeah, he doesnt really have a face, and Lord knows i wouldnt go close enough to really check) but thankfully, when Shmully came home, he did some good Midah Kineged Middah and gave that bee a piece of his mind !!! (noone stings Duby and gets away with it :) :)
So that was my adventure for the day .... (it should be documented for many years to come). For all those who are concerened, my pinkie is still pink and still a bit hurting (poor me) - but the good news is, that so far its been a great excuse for getting out of all housework: "sorry, cant wash the dishes: bee sting" and Shmully the wonderful guy that he is doesnt seem to mind ...
Thats the news from this end.... this is Duby reporting live from the scene of the crime ...
Have a wonderful night / morning ---
No comments:
Post a Comment